Total Recall

The gentle beauty of Jesus’ call to Simon Peter (“Simon, son of John, do you love me?”) sets at peace one of the unresolved moments in the Easter story. The chaos ensuing from Jesus’ resurrection has caught the disciples unprepared, but now we and the disciples are slowly making sense of what has happened.

Some noticeable pieces remain. The grief of Judas’ betrayal and death is a wound, as yet unaddressed. The fear of the disciples, leading them to desert Jesus at the cross, is answered when he meets them, gathered in a new fear in the week following the resurrection. Despite his race to the empty tomb, Peter’s encounter with the risen Christ is unaccounted, until John’s marvellous closure.

The disciples appear to be lacking direction, or perhaps they have simply returned to what they know. The fishing story echoes the original calling of the disciples, especially in Luke’s Gospel, but it is Peter’s moment which enthrals us, in which he is embraced by the resurrection itself. Jesus’ searching, gracious, questions clarify Peter’s call and reflect his three stanza denial of Jesus, even while inviting him into renewed discipleship.

Immediately upon Peter’s affirmation, Jesus describes the cost of his discipleship, reminding him – and us – that the call is never easy, but is worth everything.

When Saul is called by Jesus, early in The Acts of the Apostles, we are reminded that the call to discipleship is confronting and rigorous, even though secured in grace. Jesus’ invitation knocks Saul on his tail, blinding him for a season until he is sufficiently able to see who is truly worth following. None of the journey for the newly christened Paul is smooth and convenient, but he would choose no other path.

How do we measure the call of God? Does it fit snugly into our plans for the life we have selected? Do we shape the call of God to accommodate our expectations? I have met people for whom the call to discipleship is like a coffee card: stamped when we use it, and slotted into our wallets until next time. At some point we might elect to claim its benefits, but it doesn’t intrude into our lifestyle.

I know others who describe the call of God solely by how it “feels” – to them. I wonder how Paul felt as Jesus called him. I wonder what Peter’s feelings were when he heard how his discipleship would be ultimately fulfilled. I am not convinced that how we feel is the best measure of God’s call.

There are some who will specifically describe call as part of their life – missionaries and ministers for example – but call is not about profession. We are, each of us, called to be Jesus’ disciples and, in the purest sense, baptism is our mark of ordination.

In this week, as Peter and Paul are invited to follow to their life’s end and in their life’s beginning, consider your call and how you measure it – by your success, security and convenience, or by the measures which mark those who were first called in grace, challenge and hope.